12.31.2009

Chrysanthemum morifolium 'Vesuvio'

Otherwise known as the White Spider Mum.

When the time came to order flowers for the funeral my first thought was
"I want them happy".
It's the reason we chose a light blue casket (Peyton's most favorite color ever) and why I made the funeral program the way I did.
I wanted them happy.

We looked through the book and found an arrangement with these. They were perfect. White and happy.

We had them included in the arrangements we chose to flank Peyton's casket at his viewing and then taken to the cemetery to mark his grave.

Last Saturday we were in Humble and stopped by to see Peyt. The dirt, still unsettled, was surrounded by all of the beautiful flowers that had been placed there a week earlier. We let the kids each pick a flower to bring home with them. After selecting his favorite, Trey picked this one and handed it to me. He had no idea how perfect it was. It had weathered a week in the cold and rain and still looked like this.

These happy, spunky, white flowers will forever remind me of Peyt.

Pictures Worth Way More Than a Thousand Words

It's now been two weeks since Peyton died. I don't yet have the words to describe or even the clarity to fully make sense of what it is like without our little boy. I find I'm often torn between trying to remember so I won't ever forget, and not trying to think about him being gone so I don't lose it like I imagine I would. Until I figure that one out, I've been working on gathering some of my favorite pictures of Peyton's last weeks.


It all started November 2nd when his P.E. teacher approached me after school and said "Mrs. Ricker, Peyton fell today. He's fine, but we couldn't figure it out. He was standing, and just fell."

6 weeks and 4 hours later he passed away. All of these pictures were taken during those 6 weeks...


Waiting to be on the morning announcements to receive his reading team shirt
The day he was presented his printed book, adopted manatee certificate, and this guy, who he named Nicky. Two of the last pictures we have of Peyton with a natural smile.
Why was he smiling? Because he was hiding under the slide and tossing pebbles onto unsuspecting siblings and cousins as they came down.
A group of clowns volunteered their time and came to Peyton's birthday party. We had been worried about Peyton feeling sad about not being able to do much but these clowns saved the day. Within minutes the 2,327 little kids were all adequately equipped with balloon swords and fabulous apparel. Our last family picture just after Peyton's baptism.
Peyt was baptized on a Sunday just after our regular meetings. He kept asking if it was time yet. He was so excited.
Peyton's P.E. teachers stocked he and Trey (who had long since joined in on the 2nd graders class) with lego sets to work on when the rest of the kids were doing activities he wasn't able to participate in. This time was SO important and special to Trey.After Peyt could no longer attend school I would take him up occasionally to go to class, lunch, the library, music and most often P.E. Why? Because of this ridiculous game...

After this busy day Peyton was exhausted. He was laying on the couch while we worked to get everyone settled and dinner ready. As I walked back and forth for different reasons through our living room I caught bits of what was I realize was a monumental effort to make it over to the duffle bag on our stairs and get suited up in this... I remember how his sweet little body felt at this moment.

12.17.2009

10 years...

10 years ago today we knelt across the alter in the Dallas Temple and were married and sealed for time and all eternity.

There are times it seems like just yesterday, and times it seems like forever ago.

Now more than ever I am grateful for sacred covenants we made that allows our family to be together forever. I never thought a ten year period could be so eventful.

So, ten of my favorite things about our marriage:

1. Betting on college bowl games, NCAA tournament, and golf majors. On the line? Nothing but pride and bragging rights. I go for the team with the cuter mascot, Robert the team with the best record and we always come out pretty even.

2. In-house dates once the kids are in bed. Chili's is so much tastier eaten on the couch in p.j.s while watching a movie.

3. Our tolerance, and even mild amusement, for each other's favorite shows (Oh, Robert likes Glee. He just won't ever admit it!)

4. We can get competitive over anything. Tucking kids in bed, folding clothes, number of pictures the kids draw us, who's name Jack says first (it's "dad" of course, just like the rest of the little ingrates!)...

5. If we're somewhere together in separate cars we always end up racing home. I mean, really racing (man we're bad examples for the kids sometimes! They love this game too!)

6. We do the chores each other despises.

7. Our discussions about my school work. Engineers and Archaeologists have very different opinions on the significance (or lack there of) of historical events. I like knowing what he thinks about the stuff I study (even if he's wrong).

8. Our discussions about Robert's work. Engineers and Archaeologists have very different opinions on the logistics of "take all of your kids to work day/week". (Alright, maybe that one's more dads vs. moms). I like knowing what he's up to.

9. Preparing talks or lessons together for church. We always find each other the best quotes and scriptures.

10. Robert is in the bishopric at church so on Sundays he sits on the stand (childless) and I sit down on a pew (childfull). No, this is not the liking part of #10. What I do love about this is whenever one of our kids whispers something not so whisper-like (perhaps a commentary on the taste of the Sacrament bread, for example), or Jack starts laughing hysterically at Trey smacking himself, or Bailey calling for the 17 year old boy she's going to marry, Robert gets the sweetest grin on his face. At first I thought he was just entertained by the circus that is our family. But he gets the grin on his face even when the kids are behaving remarkably well. Little moments like these show me how much he loves and appreciates me.
We've now made it through the hardest time of our lives together. Eternity should be a breeze.



12.16.2009

Family and Friends,

We thank you all for the love, support and prayers on behalf of Peyton and our family during this time. We are truly grateful for the Christ-like love that has been and continues to be offered on our behalf.

The funeral is being handled by Restwood Funeral Home and the arrangements are as follows:

A viewing will be held from 8:30 a.m until 9:40 a.m. on Saturday, December 19th, at The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, 502 Southern Oaks, Lake Jackson, TX, 77566.

The funeral service will follow at 10:00 a.m. at the same location.

The interment will be on Saturday, December 19th at 2:00 p.m. at the Rosewood Cemetery, 2602 S. Houston, Humble, TX, 77396.

12.15.2009


Peyton Thomas Ricker
December 6, 2001 - December 15, 2009
Peyton passed away this morning after a brave battle with brain cancer.
He lives now free of the pain and limitaions his Earthly body experienced.


I am a child of God and He has called me home.
My earthly journey's through but still, I do not walk alone.
He leads me, guides me, walks beside me, helps me find the way.
He welcomed me with open arms. I live with Him today.


I am a child of God and I have gone ahead.
My earthly life was brief but oh, such peace and love you gave.
You loved me, held me, stood beside me and though I cannot stay.
You gave me much to help me and I live with Him today.


I am a child of God and I will wait for you.
Celestial glory shall be ours, if you can but endure.
I'll lead you, guide you, walk beside you.
Help you find the way.
I'll welcome you with open arms
One bright Celestial day.



--Donna Kulliard




12.10.2009

9 Years

Today 9 years ago we became parents. We welcomed our beautiful baby Tyler into the world and he has been lighting up our life ever since.
He is a child with big ideas and even bigger dreams. He's a great oldest child and a wonderful big brother.
He loves making people laugh. He can organize like no other kid which is good because he keeps EVERYTHING!
Tyler is very sensitive and thoughtful and tries very hard to understand others.
Our family is so grateful to have Tyler.
We are so proud of the young man he is becoming.
Happy Birthday my wonderful boy. We love you so much.





12.09.2009

Luck of the Irish

Well, we're not really Irish.

Just lucky enough to have two sets of Irish twins.

Today is one of the 3 days each year that Tyler and Peyton are the same age.

Tyler's 8. Peyton's 8.
Yep, great huh?
They bring out the best in each other and understand one another like no one else can. They know each others thoughts, dreams and wishes. They are each others very best friend.

12.07.2009

8 Years

"Look at his hair!" Robert said as he held our brand new little baby up next to me so I could see him.

"How big is he?" I asked as he came much sooner then we expected.

"Look at his hair!" was the reply.

"Is he big enough?"

"Look at his hair!"

And then daddy and baby were taken off to the nursery while my c-section was finished.

When I finally got to hold him, I laughed as I realized why Robert was so shocked.
His tiny little head was covered in wild bright orange hair. He was so beautiful.
Peyton is an unlikely mix of extreme stubbornness, and gentle compassion. He is strong willed and peacefully accommodating. He is a friend to everyone and loves to make others happy. He likes being good. He has a fantastic sense of humor.
He loves blue, superheroes, drawing pictures, trucks and manatees. He could eat tater tot casserole and Hawaiian haystacks every night of the week. He wants to be a nautical archaeologist when he grows up. He can't wait to have a wife and kids and share a house with Tyler and his family.

God has trusted us with this amazing little boy and for that we will be forever grateful. We are honored to be his family. His short life has been a testimony of the love of our Lord, Jesus Christ. He has been carried by angels through his trials and stands as a witness of the truthfulness of the restored gospel.

I know that today we celebrated Peyton's last birthday. Next December 6th will be quiet around here. His eight years have been full of marvelous experiences and we're blessed to have been able to share them with him.

His strength has strengthened us. We have been sealed for time and all eternity and thus have the promise of being a family forever. Death cannot change that.

Happy Birthday my sweet Peyton. You make my heart happy.

12.05.2009

Honesty is the Best Policy (I guess)

One thing I learned early on in motherhood is that if a child is old enough to talk, they are old enough unintentionally insult.

One morning I was in my bedroom still in pjs. I describe them at this point only because it is necessary to appreciate the coming conversation. My shirt is a solid khaki colored tee with a few buttons, the first ones undone, down the top quarter of my shirt. On either side of the buttons is a small flapped pocket. I don't remember what pants I was wearing because Trey had nothing to say about them.

"I like your shirt mom"

"Thanks Trey" (giving him a good morning hug)

"It looks like you should work at Disneyworld"

"Thanks Trey" (no longer giving him a good morning hug)

"You could drive the safari jeep!"


(I smile at this point because, quite frankly, I'm impressed by his attention to detail and to be honest, I couldn't really argue. He made a very valid point)



I've learned to really appreciate moments like this. Why? Because on Sunday mornings when I come out of my room with a cute dress and fabulous shoes on and Trey says "wow mom, you look like a princess" I know he's being completely honest.

12.04.2009

Peyton Ricker Day

Here are some pictures from Peyton Ricker Day a couple of weeks ago...
Peyton and Sparky

Peyton with the Mayor and School Superintendent


Arrival at the school... It was nuts!
Peyton talks about all of his new brothers. Just last night they filled our street with fire trucks and our home with happiness when a bunch of them stopped by to bring cupcakes and sing Peyton happy birthday.



Out! Out Swirling Thoughts!

Every now and then my head gets too full of random swirling thoughts and although there is usually a good reason for them to be there, I find myself outrageously distracted by them.
Thrown into the mix is the comparison I always end up noting between my renegade thoughts and If You Give a Mouse a Cookie. One thought leads to another which leads to another and so on. It's a good time, let me tell you.

In a week and a half Robert goes in for another scan. It was only two and a half years ago that I was standing in line at chick-fil-a when my cell phone rang. It was Robert's surgeon and he didn't want to talk to me. Just him. My heart sank as I knew exactly what was coming. Robert had cancer. This news came 3 days after my dad died of it, and 1 year before my mom was diagnosed with it. And then our little Peyton whose burial plot I selected on Monday. Like Peyton's scans, I always get so antsy before Robert's. One thing history has taught us is that anything goes.

Although I'm very likely to spend the next week or so in somewhat of a spacey trance, I appreciate the humbling reminder that I can't do this alone. It wasn't until my dad helped plan his own funeral service from his hospital bed at MD Anderson that I learned what his favorite hymn was. "I Need Thee Every Hour". Oh how true that is and yet how easy it is to forget.

12.02.2009

Festival of Lights

The weekend before Thanksgiving was the annual Festival of Lights parade. The kids had been invited by the local fire department to ride aboard a couple of their trucks. They made their way past us smiling and waving. They were so excited! Peyton had all of his gear on.


We had arranged to collect the kids back at the fire station. Robert and I arrived first and were waiting when the first fire truck pulled up. Somewhere during the trip, Trey had convinced their new pal Benny that they needed a tour of the fire department.


So off they went.

Thanks Benny! (And Cindy, for letting us borrow him)

Well...


...not really a fan of the bouncy slide.

Kindergarten Feast

The week of Thanksgiving, the kindergartners had a feast. They were allowed to come dressed up for the event. I, of course, recommended that Trey be an Indian. A very vital part of the original feast but more importantly, a much easier costume to come up with.

Trey had a different idea.

"I will look RIDICULOUS as an Indian!"

He was SO lucky we had an acceptable color sheet to sacrifice for the cause.

Sunday night here's what I came up with...


After taking this picture, he said "Wait! I need to do my Pilgrim face."



He was the lone Pilgrim at a party of Indians.